Wednesday, December 31, 2008

New Year Blessings

Well, the pumpernickel laced with fennel, anise and orange rind is cracked and blistered-- has filled the house with aromatic bliss, and is nearly ready to pull from the oven... The lights have a special twinkly glow, and flicker every so often, as the icy wind is howling up a gale outside... The juxtaposition is clear, my fortune apparent.

May all of you have the warmth and security of hearth and heart this New Year.

Monday, December 29, 2008


Why should I care, if in Googling myself, I find I'm erroneously listed as 62 years old? I have a number of people in my life who are that approximate age. I respect them enormously. I enjoy their humor. The look alright, in some cases stunning, for their age. I guess my big gripe is: I am not yet anywhere near 62 years of age! It is ludicrous to worry about such things, I suppose. Anyone can see I am not. Or can they? I have been getting a number of solicitations in the mail to purchase things that only senior citizens could want or qualify to receive. Has my identity been stolen (again)? Or are these solicitations based on this one typographical error which when viewed online, gives no indication that it may be false?

I called the company to blame; a reunion service. They deleted the file. I asked, "Why not just correct the file?" They stated, "too late-- it has already been deleted." Hmm. I see. And yet, upon re-Googling, there it remains. Forever in a Google search: my name, the places I've lived in the past 12 years (don't get me started on that) and my age/rank-- Sexagenarian. While that sounds pretty good... sexy...that brings me to another point.

I know it's narcissistic of me, but I think that aging myself several decades in short matter of time has made me feel I need to fight for my (waning?) sexual viability. This is all just perception, and as far as I know, it is all on my part. (who else of import would Google me, take the word of such a service and apply it in any way truly pertinent to my sense of self? Johnny Depp?) But for some reason, I at my age, have received this error as an accusation and a challenge. Very young women would likely say, "Ewwww... Gross! " and then laugh and laugh and email the link to friends. Men of any age would probably look at it clinically and then forget it. After all, men can wrinkle, go gray, develop a paunch, and even have "midlife crises" where they strive to relive their youth, and only pursue women of grossly inappropriate ages. Women of a "certain age"? What comes to your mind when you hear the words, "62 year old woman". If not careful, I could easily hear "old woman" and see a nondescript crone. It is not an age; it's a label. Women over 35 who enjoy and pursue younger men? Well, those are called Cougars. Men of any age who pursue younger women? They are just called "men". Unless of course they do it with any less grace than Hugh Hefner (talk about gross); those men we sometimes call lecherers.

Even women who are growing older gracefully and look fantastic are the brunt of cynicism and jokes. Even from me. But now I need to bolster them, lest I become them. So, come on Heather Locklear (who recently played the lead in a tv film "Flirting with Forty" where her character is supposedly 39, and dealing with the same things I'm talking about. In actuality, she is 47; why not make it "50 and still flirty?" It's 50 she's flirting with, and she still looks great.) Come on Diane Lane. And to keep the ball rolling, here is a link to gorgeous sexy women we all know and love, aged 40 to 73. You go, girlfriends!

I could wax philosophical here and talk about the real and perceived aspects of time, of the nature of yin and yang, of creation and decay, but really I'd like prepare all of you, myself most of all, for that day, that decade in the distant future when I finally get my sexy sixpack...

Creative Commons License
This work by is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.